Fired
Mr. got fired today. Sigh.
He called to tell me from the airport in NYC where he had been getting some special training. He and his co-worker skipped the last day of training, and the teacher emailed them to ask why, and cc:d their boss. But that isn’t why he got fired. He got fired for sending a reply to the teacher where he said, thanks for telling my boss, narc bitch.
His boss told him on the phone which I thought showed incredible lack of balls.
Unfortunately, the Mr. has had a problem keeping a job since I met him. Because of the completely neglected way he was raised, he has trouble with boundaries and self-discipline.
This is a kid who never, ever had a bedtime, or had to go to school if he didn’t feel like it. He made his own food. He did his own laundry. His mom pulled him out in 8th grade to “home school” him, which basically meant he babysat the little ones so she could go do her own thing. So he learned on his own. He read books, and taught himself all about math, physics, history, computers.
He never went to high school or college, but his IQ was tested in junior high at 155. When I met him he was a little street punk who worked at Pizza Hut, but I helped him parlay his talents into real jobs.
Unfortunately, most were short-lived.
In between those jobs, he started his own business and did a lot of freelance work. He had some success, but not enough.
This last job was with a well-known advertising agency, and it seemed like the job of a lifetime. It paid great, no late checks, and they offered amazing benefits including profit sharing. I just can’t believe he fucked it up AGAIN. This one lasted only 2 months.
We are so fucked. Our financial situation was already seriously compromised from him being unemployed for the first four months of this year. We owe the IRS a small fortune for underestimating our freelance taxes for a couple of years. We got a slew of medical bills after one of the aforementioned deadbeat employers did not pay our insurance premium. Every time it looks like we might get our heads above water, like we might finally be able to buy a house, he loses his job.
Trey says he is afraid of success. I don’t know what to think.
I’m surprisingly unemotional actually. This has happened so many times in the last 8 years, I just don’t freak out about it anymore. I also don’t get involved in looking for a new job – that’s his problem. I may have held his hand early on in our marriage, but he stopped needing my help a long time ago.
That’s part of what’s frustrating. He has grown so much in this area. But I can’t pay the rent with progress, only accomplishment.
So I’m sitting here waiting to go pick him up in a few hours, trying desperately to prepare. How should I act? What I want to do is give a big goddamn lecture. I want to explain in excruciating detail why he is a complete fucking moron for letting this happen. But I know it won’t help. He was all swagger on the phone, but I could tell he was upset.
So, my Mr., I am going to play the part of the supportive spouse as best I can. I’m going to push away my anger and frustration and focus on moving forward. I’m going to hold my tongue about what you should have done differently. I’m going to offer comfort and understanding. You stupid fucking ass.
